So you say that yer world is too scary?
Well yer not the only one!
And you say things is getting too hairy?
A shaver has come!

Tell me yer dreams are all fuzzy
And I'll know just what you mean
Lend yer ear and you'll hear a great buzzing
Baby, I'm a blast of clean

I'm Latherman
Latherman
I'd rather, ma'am
I'm Latherman

Stand in the five o'clock shadow
With yer mad mustachio
Steady hand as I land in the battle - oh!

I'm Latherman
Latherman
I'd rather, ma'am
I'm Latherman

OOh -- aahh
Icing on the pie
Ultra g-lide
Such a delight
Smooth from left to right
I'll make you satisfied
And I'll pat the world dry

So you say that yer lost in the jungle?
Underdown and overgrown?
When you think you feel razor-crazy

Latherman has come to shave the world!
Latherman has come to shave the world!
Latherman and I've come to shave the world