'Seventeen' was an underfunded comedy
About love and drugs and girls and immortality
And most of the jokes just kinda hung around and died

'Nineteen' was a 90 second short
About a cartoon kid who sits and drinks on his porch
And gets pissed
He took one good swipe at his wrist but he missed so he lived

These teenage chicks, they grow up so quick
I swear they must get sucked up by the television
And we're still losing lights in the fight for the teenage liberation

'Twenty three' was a shot of straight frustration
Flying down the pathways, he was dying in the bars
He mostly ate all his meals in his car

'Twenty nine' was the end of the line
He stayed up for 16 nights at a stretch, he was wrecked
You could see all the veins in his neck when he flexed

These senior class chicks, they're the easiest to kiss
They got nothing to lose and they know it
You just fill up their cup at the keg a couple a times
And it's pretty much up to you not to blow it

All the coolest guys have all the coolest rides
But they're colliding with the inanimation
We're still losing lights in the fight for the teenage liberation

Teenage heat is a warm and wet and heavy situation
Such sweaty exultation and soft, sharp penetration
On unsupervised vacations

Kissing boys and getting wasted
Hot and soft and generally complacent

'Seventeen' is an underfunded comedy