How could one woman take her family of girls
And make a media dynasty that took over the world?
You can criticise and player-hate and say you don't care
But the Met Ball would suck
if their asses weren't there

So would E! Instagram, Snapchat and the S-vies
They fuss and fight and disrespect
but always end up besties
These Calabasas queens give us life
they're so glam
And here is how this clan became the new royal fam... ily

[Les Deux Nightclub Hollywood, Two Thousand Six]
Oh yeah yeah yeah
I'm Britney and you should hear how I sing
I'm Lindsay [coughs] and fire crotch is my thing
(That's hot) I'm Paris, and I don't have to do anything
But bitches bow down
'cause I'm the new Miss Thing

Paparazzi popping pictures 'cause we're dressed so fancy
The press only posts when we're not wearing panties
(Oops, I think I just did it again)
Hey you, get out the way! Our pussies are on fire
No, they're just on display-yay-yay-yay-yay
(Oh my god she's right) (It's totally out) (Yeah)

[Spoken]
Anyway, who are you?
I'm Kim
Kim who?
Ahem
[Sung] Kimberly Kardashian
Who?
[Sung] Kimerbly Kardashian
That's what I thought you said

Hey Britney, can I be in your gang?
If you hold our Birkin bags then maybe you can hang
Hey Paris, how'd you get so famous?
You make a home movie and you just act shameless
(What kind of movie?)

[Kris's Old House, Calabasas Two Thousand Seven]
Kimmy, I should be your manager
You know, since I'm your mom
Mom, you're such an amateur
You'd definitely bomb
Mama-Ger! (That's me!)
Is that absurd?
Kourt, Khlo, I think I just made up a word!
Mama-Ger!
I'll get you on a Tv show
I'll film you eating salad and we'll rake in the dough
Mama-Ger

We're sisters! A-whoo!
Sisters
I'm Kim and I'm the bombshell
Banging booty you know well
There's Ray J, and then Kanye, with a pitstop in the Nba
(And I break the internet every other day, suckers)

I'm Khloe, and I only date ballers
Big [sweet?] butt them makes them all holla
The gay boys favourite, you know it's true
Puts us large and in charge, but you already knew-ooh
Sisters

Are you keeping up? I'm Kourtney
I'm the little big sister in the family
I'm educated with a college degree
So why do I let Scott stick his Disick in me?

Sisters! A-whoo!
We're the Og-3
(Don't you mean four, like four sisters?)
(Mom!)
Sisters! A-whoo!
It's the Us of K!
No one's gonna come take that away
(Sisters)

[Kris's New House, Calabasas Two Thousand Fourteen]
(Hello) (Hello)
(Kendall, Kylie, please report to your) Mama-Ger!

We love our big sisters, they're oh so adoring
But your storylines
were starting to get a little boring
We were in the background
but we've come a long way
Now you can't spell Kardashian without a big fat J
(get it?) (yeah)

Hey, my name is Kendall, and I'm a supermodel
I took to the runway like a baby with the bottle
I've waled for Oscar, Karl, and Diane von Furstie
I shun the limelight while my sisters are thirsty

I'm Kylie! I'm the one with the lips
80 million fans want my makeup tips
I've got my own clothing line
and my own lip plumper
Got a Jenner face
and a Kardashian dumper

We've got the best selling apps
we're an online addiction
Sisters ruling the world and we'll keep on kicking!
Yes!

Don't think y'all could do this without me!
Blac Chyna up in here!
Blac Chyna!
I'm the video vixen of the [muh] Kardashians
If you wanna piece of me? Suck it. I'm trashing that
Had a baby with Tyga
but he dumped me for Kylie
I'm the Kardashian wrecking ball
but don't call me Miley
I'm stealing the spotlight and no one can help me
Now you're riding my coattails
and liking my selfies, unh!
All right, I'm out, I'm out

[Outer space, twenty twenty five]
This new American dynasty has only just begun
Next is the galaxy, so step aside hun
My name is North West, don't be acting all distressed
I became the best of the rest
by nursing on Kim's breast

I'm the new face of rap, reality royalty
Had my first fragrance out when I was only age three
President at nine, then queen of the milky way
Then I cured cancer, yes it started with a K

Now Kim is my mama-gee
but Kris is still here
She gonna be running the show for 3, 000 more years
(Selfie! Click!)

(Do we still take selfies in the future?)
(That's hot!)
The greatest story ever told, and we've only just begun!
We're not famous for nothing
we're the Kardashians!
Kardashians!

(Now streaming on Dvd)