Robyn
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Curriculum Vitae

Robyn

Robyn


Konichiwa Records Headquarters


You can't stop it You can't escape it You can't turn
it off
So I'd appreciate your kind consideration in this
matter
Sir or Mam would you please turn it the fuck up
Do it

Unleashed in the east
Best dressed in the west
Sorted in the north
Without a doubt in the south

The queen of queen bees
Lioness of Judah
Phoenix from the ashes risen

Undefeated undisputed featherweight champion
on all five continents

World record holder with a high score of two gazillion
in Tetris
Two-time recipient of the Nobel prize for super
foxiest female ever
and war time consigliere to the Cosa Nostra

She split the atom, invented the x-ray,
the cure for AIDS, and the surprise
blindfold greeting

She performed and choreographed the fights
for Bruce Lee in Enter the Dragon
and Game of death and still does stunt doubles
for Jackie Chan on the weekends

She suckerpunched Einstein, outsmarted Ali, and
even outsuperfreaked Rick James
She's the founder and CEO of Konichiwa Records
The most decorated professional field operative in the
industry
and in the streets
With a perfect track record since kindergarten where
she used to
whoop schoolboy ass

She's listed in section 202 of the United
Nations Security Act of 1979
as being too hot to wear tight sweaters on
international airspace
In this world of tension pressure and pain
she is known by men and women of all origin and faith
for her wisdom, compassion, and relentless
determination in the quest to get paid

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