[Verse 1] Buy my CD or I'll break your fuckin' head I got 15 hundred copies in boxes under my bed Heard what I said, buy it, shit at least try it This shit is dope as fuck don't make me pull your ears with pliers Ain't no one buyin' my album it should've been platinum At least gold, the kids don't buy my shit I'm gonna crack'em My idea street promotion is drivin' through places And peggin' promo tapes at peoples faces sayin' "buy it you homo" A promo, what? you want free shit You better pay up, I'll even take food stamps kid If you ain't got a job, man it's cool you can rob Still from your old man, cuz he's a fat drunken slob And ya mom, she's blown in lonely Ville for 20 So just tell that smelly hoe you need some money buddy I go to the stores that are selling LP's Tell'em move some fuckin' units or I'll break your friggin knees Emcees don't even wanna battle me now My put my lyrics up because I started knockin' bitches out Interrupt rock sets from alternative bands I snatch the mic and start beatin' till it's hurtin' my hands Then I kick my wicked flows until the cops are called I'll throw a bar stool and start a bar room brawl As I run out the door, just before I jet Don't forget to buy my album on CD or cassette
[Chorus] I'm a dope emcee but a shitty self promoter I'll sign a contract for a hoagie and soda I'ma use force like as if my name was Yoda Buy my shit quick man just do what I told ya Can't work for a living gotta eat off this Plus I gotta crib, and a wife, and a kid I'ma shove in your face till you purchase it Just buy my friggin album bitch!
[Verse 2] Don't be a cheap fuck it's just 11.99 And it's worth it, I ain't sayin' that because it's mine If it's whack, don't even think you'll get your money back You and your boys can make fun of it, yo I like it when you crack Take a bat, and use the thing for batting practice man smash it I don't give a fuck man fuckin' bash it you can have it I really don't care man just purchase the shit I really don't feel like havin' to hurt you bitch But I will, so find a way to cop my shit quick Before I find you first, and beat 'cha fat ass wit a stick Go on Carson Daily's show and request my video "You ain't got one" I know, just fuckin' do it yo The radio don't play me and I got no distribution Ima walk into Land Speed and just start shootin' I can't sell cds even in my own city Ima change my name to Q stiggy and start actin' jiggy I got promo posters as wall paper in my crib And I wonder why no one's ever heard of my shit If I went out and promoted I could probably sell a record But instead I'll just sit and scratch myself, hey yo check it
If you don't go out and buy my cd I'm gonna fuckin' kick your ass I ain't even playin' wit 'chu I am literally gonna knock you the fuck out If you don't go out and buy the shit Just fuckin' buy it man You can afford it What the fuck is wrong wit 'chu? It's a fuckin' dope album man just pick it up What 'chu mean you never heard of me? It doesn't matter if you never heard of me I'm fuckin' tellin' you now just buy the shit, what?