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Jo Calderone's Monologue

Lady Gaga

"Hey. My name is Jo Calderone and I was an asshole.
Gaga? Yeah her. Lady Gaga. She left me.
She said it always starts out good and then the guys,
meaning me, I'm one of the guys, we get crazy.
I did. I got crazy, but she's fucking crazy too, right?
I mean, she's fucking crazy.
For example, she gets out of the bed, puts on the heels.
She goes into the bathroom. I hear the water go on.
She comes out of the bathroom, dripping wet.
She still has the heels on.
And what's with the hair?
At first it was sexy but now I'm just confused.
She said I'm just like the last one.
I'm not like the last one... And I think it's great, you know?
I think it's really fucking great that she's such a star,
a big beautiful star in the sky, but how am I supposed to shine?
I mean, I think I'd be okay with it, you know,
if I felt like she really was being herself with me.
And maybe she is. I'm starting to think she is,
'cause when she gets on the stage, she holds nothing back ?
that spotlight, that big rounded spotlight
follows her everywhere she goes.
Sometimes I think it follows her home. I know it does.
I got to get in there.
When she fucks, it's like she covers her face
'cause she doesn't want me to see,
but she can't stand to have one honest moment
where nobody's watching.
I want her to be real, but she says, 'Jo,I'm not real. I'm theater
and you and I... This is just rehearsal. I got to get in there."

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