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    Ladies and gentlemen
    The host of phat, uhh, Phat or Wack?
    Uhh your friend and mine
    Bink Chipperwink (Applause)
    Hello everybody
    I'm Bink Chipperwink
    And this is Phat or Wack!
    The rules are simple
    Each one of our teams will play music
    From their upcoming album
    And the studio audience will judge by applause
    Now let's meet our contestants
    Team number 1 from the Southwest side of Detroit
    They are Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope
    The Insane Clown Posse (Boo!)
    And team number 2 from the East side of Detroit
    They are Jamie Madrox and the Monoxide Child
    Twiztid (Boo!)
    Now let's play Phat or Wack
    Alright team number 1 first
    The Insane Clown Posse, are you ready?
    Yeah, yeah I'm ready Bink, we ready
    What song are you gonna play for us?
    Terrible, naww umm
    Fuck the world, yeah yeah
    Uhh, Bink Fuck the World, yup
    Ladies and gentlemen
    This is Insane Clown Posse Fuck the World
    It's your turn to judge
    Phat or Wack?

    Fuck, fuck that shit
    Fuck give it to me
    If I only could I'd set the world on fire (x3)
    Say fuck the world
    Fuck 'em all
    Fuck you, fuck me, fuck us
    Fuck Tom, fuck Mary, fuck Gus
    Fuck Dairius
    Fuck the West coast
    And fuck everybody on the East
    Eat shit and die
    Or fuck off at least
    Fuck pre-schoolers, fuck rulers
    Kings and queens and gold jewelers
    Fuck wine coolers
    Fuck chickens, fuck ducks
    Everybody in your crew sucks
    Punk muthafucks
    Fuck critics, fuck your review
    Even if you like me, FUCK YOU!
    Fuck your Mom, fuck your Mom's Mama
    Fuck the Beastie Boys and the Daili Llama
    Fuck the rain forest, fuck a Forest Gump
    You probably like it in the rump
    Fuck a shoe pump
    Fuck the real deal
    And fuck all the fakes
    Fuck all 52 states, oooh
    And fuck...

    (Buzz) Well, that sound means that your time is out
    Ladies and gentlemen of the audience
    If you thought was phat let's hear a round of applause
    (Crickets chirp)
    Ewww, I'm sorry
    Well, that could mean only one thing
    Ok we're gonna move right along here
    Team number 2, Twiztid
    Are you gentlemen ready?
    Yeah we straight
    Ok what's your first selection for us today?
    Hey, hey man they just hoed my shit
    Fuck the World was the shit
    Naww, uh uh
    We gonna come with 2nd Hand sec, this on?
    2nd Hand Smoke, yeah yeah 2nd Hand Smoke
    Alright ladies and gentlemen prepare yourself
    This is Twiztid, 2nd Hand Smoke
    You be the judge
    Phat or Wack?

    Free your mind
    I represent the East side, no peace
    Fuck the police
    We tell you to increase the deceased at least
    A grown man tellin you something that he believe
    Practice to deceive, no more tricks up my sleeve
    What the fuck bitch, chuck bitch
    Why you talkin shit?
    Better duck bitch
    Before your dome get hit
    This shit is Twiztid deeper than that Old French braid
    Stickier than jam and jelly phased, kick it
    Everybody else real talkin bout something
    What you thought you heard bitch,
    Can it, cause your frontin
    Dead wrong
    Dinner table conversations
    Leavin' you pistol-whipped in the corner with abrasions
    Part of the contamination of Mind State
    Sleep in a dream, hopin it's gone when I awake
    Mama think I'm a play on play serial killa
    Fruitloop biting my mind like Godzilla
    We survive like catapillas in cocoons and caskets
    Stretch the industry like elastic
    So fantastic, like the Newport cigarette that I smoke
    Hit the motherfucka till I choke
    I brag and I boast about nothin
    Death, dying, and hoes fuckin
    So understand that he's saying something
    Never be heard I'm underground with the dirt and grime
    Smashin heads be my reason for rhyme
    I'm on time like a motherfucka
    Leavin you hangin in the forest
    Standin in some comfortable shifts like Chuck Norris
    Check the chorus
    Second hand smoke when you breath
    Remember what I told you always believe
    You relieve on the Monoxide Child and wild
    Travel the world on nine cloud screaming loud
    Free your mind
    Breath it in second hand smoke
    Free your mind
    Breath it in second hand smoke
    You phony bitches wanna shut...

    Oh times up
    Audience Phat or Wack?
    Applause please
    (One clap, then wind blowing)
    Ohh I'm sorry
    It seems that this audience also feels
    Personally I think they both suck
    Ok back to contestants number 1
    Uhh hopefully this time gentlemen
    You'll come with somethin
    A little more likable for me and the audience
    (They fuckin suck)
    Are you ready?
    Yeah man c'mon
    Yeah we ready fat bitch
    What's the name of your selection?
    Uhh hold on hold on uhh I have the bomb shit dawg
    The Shaggy Show, can't fail
    That's wack dawg
    Aight then what?
    Mufuckin Terrible...
    Aight hey we want you to play uhh Terrible, Bink
    Here it is, Insane Clown Posse, Terrible
    Phat or Wack?

    You don't know shit do ya?
    You wouldn't know shit
    If it ripped into your ugly bitch ass face
    You ain't even begun to expierence drama muthafucka Your Mama
    Your muthafuckin big fat chicken faced assed Mama
    Don't even know about this drama, muthafucka
    Oh my god look at that, turn it up please
    Poor Nancy Kerrigan's sweet little knees
    Somebody took a black thing and went thump
    That's terrible we heard about it for months
    What about that one nobody guy that they found
    Dead in the grass
    With his dick in his ass
    Unless there was more
    But you won't recall
    Cause Michael Jackson squeezed up
    On some little kids balls
    What you consider DRAMA
    Ain't all that
    It's just that your wack
    With your intergalactic satellite data compress
    Yes, but we can't feed the homeless
    And then OJ's wack story unfolded
    Everybody watched that while Okalahoma exploded
    900 good reasons why this world don't really care
    Thats what it costs for a wheel chair!
    What you know bout terrible?
    Terrible, you don't know what's terrible
    Terrible, what you know bout terrible?
    Terrible, you don't know what's terrible...

    There's the buzzer
    Audience Phat or Wack?
    Ohh you guys fuckin suck
    Your momma sucks my dick
    Ok we'll move back over here to team number 2
    Twiztid are you ready?
    Man fuck you we ready
    Do you have a song selected?
    Yeah we got a song
    What you wanna go with
    Man it don't matter
    This muthafucka (They booing everything)
    Yeah that's what I'm sayin
    Rock the Dead, fuck it
    Bink bitch
    Bink bitch
    Fuck you
    This is Twiztid Rock the Dead
    Phat or Wack?

    Wake up, float to the sky
    Bring the wicked shit and the dead will arise
    Wake up, float to the sky
    Bring the wicked shit and the dead will arise
    Come on
    Space and beyond
    Mind dumpin in the yard
    I stoles your headstone from your grave plot
    Conscience and confused
    Seen tomorrows dreams on tonights news
    Fallin through a hole in the sky
    Will I die?
    You know the time multiplied with this life, love, and lies
    Steppin in the darkness
    Walkin through my conscience
    Like an android I remain heartless
    Underground, and mental know me well
    Bring it to the white lights of the depths of Hell
    Walk through the time flux hand and hand with clear mind
    Chords are harmonious like the rhythm of windchimes
    Peel back the rhyme and examine the fruit
    Rotten to the core buried in they best suits
    Maggots crawling on they face,
    Eyes sunk in they head
    Throw your fuckin arms up and rock the dead
    Wake up, float to the sky
    Bring the wicked shit and the dead will arise
    Wake up, float to the sky
    Bring the wicked shit and the dead will arise
    Come on
    Got me a mic, and now we ache like the dead
    And all we wanna do is rock the dead
    So many thoughts runnin all through my head
    But the only one that's clear is rock the...

    Time's up
    Ladies and gentlemen
    Phat or Wack?
    Ohh as that was some sort of surprise
    This audience feels
    Ok we're gonna mosey on back over to team number 1
    The Insane Clown Posse
    Fella's are you ready?
    Yeah, yeah we ready
    But I want uhh everyone in the studio audience
    To know y'all can suck my dick!
    That's great, but uhh save the drama for your momma
    Man I'm bout to bring the drama to your muthafuckin chin
    Punk ass bitch
    I'm scared, bring it
    Now this is your last chance
    Do you have a selection ready?
    Man fuck it
    Let's hit em up with Another Love Song
    Yeah they'll probably like the pussy shit
    Uhh Another Love Song bitch
    Ok ladies and gentlemen
    This is Insane Clown Posse Another Love Song
    Phat or Wack?

    Yeah, I mean I hear what your sayin
    I mean you got carried away in the moment
    And I could forgive you...I could do that
    I could do anything if I wanted to
    I could buy you a Lexus Truck
    With a white leather interior (I could)
    I could kill off some bears and dogs and shit
    Just to make you a fur coat
    I could love you and treat you with class (Oh yeah)
    And have babies fallin all out your ass
    But thinkin about that
    I feel I'd rather kill you
    Cause I got you in my car
    You ain't goin no were bitch your dead
    I'd rather cut that neck in half
    I'd rather choke out that bitch ass
    I'd rather chop and never stop
    Because you fucked my homie
    I'd rather cut that neck in half
    I'd rather choke out that bitch ass
    I'd rather chop and never stop
    Because you fucked my homie...

    Well that was a good song, (Fart) Not
    Well audience you built the casket
    Time to nail it shut
    Phat or Wack?
    Well that's gonna do it for Insane Clown Posse It's time for you guys to hit the door
    Cause you're definitely wack
    Man fuck you, fuck the show, fuck the audience (Ok)
    All y'all can fuck off
    Man fuck y'all
    Yo Jeckel Brothers out May 25th juggalos
    Yeah, yeah, yeah
    Fuck off, fuck off, fuck off
    Alright don't let the door hit you on the ass
    We've seen it all before
    People come here so eager
    And leave so bitter (Hahaha)
    On to team number 2
    Ok Twiztid here's your last chance
    Are you ready?
    Man we should fuck you up
    Negative muthafucka
    What's the selection you're gonna play?
    Uhh we got whatthefuck
    Umm there's a few but I'm tellin you man
    There's crazy booin, crazy
    I'm like it don't matter
    How does it feel? Bink bitch
    How does it feel?
    It probably feels wack
    Ladies and gentlemen
    How does it feel?
    Phat or Wack?

    How does it feel to be you
    How does it feel to feel the way you do
    It's so decisive
    And I don't care if you like or you hate me
    I know you muthafuckas bout to underrate me
    How does it feel to be you
    How does it feel to feel the way you do
    It's so decisive
    And I don't care if you like or you hate me
    I know you muthafuckas bout to underrate me
    You label me a paranoid schizophrenic
    Known on this planet for 2 things
    Talkin shit and automatic
    Mind gets transferred in little walks through the woods
    Bury you alive if I could
    Robin through the hood with a body in the trunk
    Unidentified because he's known as a chump
    I hear him keep talking junk in my ear
    But nobody else can hear
    I look around and I'm feeling weird
    Palms are sweaty I'm about to black out
    Last chance but nothing could stop this Twiztid sprout
    I'm all about mad cussing
    Fuck you and the red Martian
    Peon wrecking and skull crushing
    Turning bitches to dust and when I recite you folks die
    Like I creep in the night, I let your soul fly
    So high that I never touch ground
    Make it so your bodies never found
    Another Unsolved Mystery
    Looking for some nobody
    Every single night on TV
    Try to get me to see
    My eyes closed and rolled back
    Holdin a thought deep in my mind about a car jack
    Another break down in the middle of the street
    People just kept moving they feet
    Treat me like a freak, so how am supposed to act
    So when you see me muthafucka...

    There's the buzzer
    Audience how did that feel?
    Tell me about it
    Twiztid beat it (Man you beat it)
    Get the hell outta here (Naww fuck that)
    We been here all day
    Three strikes and your out
    June 22nd fool Twiztid Mostasteless
    Yeah I know, go ahead
    Yeah you know, you don't know nuthin bitch
    Let the door close
    Ok ladies and gentlemen
    We're not gonna leave you with all that wackness
    So as the credits roll
    We'd like you to enjoy
    The all time grand champion Danny K
    Now this is what real music is about
    Until next time
    I'm Burt Chipperwolf
    And this has been Phat or Wack
    (Some wack rapping)
    Promotional consideration paid for
    By Island slash Psychopathic
    If for any reason you should care for or like
    One of the groups that was wack
    Might I suggest you go pick up one of their albums
    The Insane Clown Posse uhh
    Entitled the Amazing Jeckel Brothers
    Which will be in stores nationwide May 25th
    Or Twiztid Mostasteless
    Which will be in stores nationwide June 22nd
    As always we'd like to thank you for your
    Participation in watching this fine television program That's copyright 1999

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