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She Named The Pony Jesus

Hard 'n Phirm


Easter comes but once a year
Chocolate eggs and bunny ears
will celebrate the murder of our Lord
Little girls love horsies
but we are very poor, see
so promises were all we could afford
Off I had been laid
So I knelt down and prayed
Can I have a pony Jesus?
Your humble servent begs
You see my little girl breathes through a tube
and has a wheelchair for her legs
I’m not askin’ you to fix her spine
or uncollapse her lung
but I know she’d thank you for that pony
if she had a working tongue
It wasn’t miracles I was looking for
when I saw that open stable door
unattended at the Mid-State County Fair
I knew I had to take it slow
and a chicken playing Tic-Tac-Toe
was the diversion I needed
to get him right out of there
So then off I took
But I was no crook
(you know why?)
For I had a pony, Jesus, it was so much more than luck
Your guiding hand dragged him past the guard
and forced him in my truck
And I know that horse won’t stop her tremors
or reattach her nose
But I know she’d hop right on that pony{line 31}if she could move her shriveled toes
I saw her waiting in the driveway
hooked up to her machines
and the happiness in her good eye
as all the thanks I’d need (I’m so great)
And as we approached he leapt to greet her
He couldn’t hold all that love in
That Divine Equine just kicked and beat her
to stomp out all that sin
And a clap of thunder sent him running
as Heaven’s rain began to fall
and he dragged her metal chariot
but she didn’t quite clear the wall
Then he galloped off to spread the Gospel
and prove that nothing is imposs’ble
And she named her pony “Jesus”
At least I think that’s what she said
‘Twas a gurgly sound that trickled out
through a hoof-print in her head
Another sound said, “Save Me”
and that’s exactly what was done
That Holy Pony brought redemption
Giddy-up, God’s only Son
Couldn’t be stony, I got her a pony
Knocked her chair over in the name of Jehovah
Clippity cloppity, he’ll never stoppedy
(Dominus te cum, Equu Sanctu)

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