Left my heart in Sydenham to walk you down the aisle
Elvis was the hand you took, ain't seen your dad in a while
Darling, if you break my heart I guess it is okay
You were born cold like an Eskimo
who eats blubber for the taste

So call if you're feeling kind of sad
What's the point of us all balding like your dad?
So call if you're feeling kind of sad
What's the point of us all turning to the bag?
Oh-oh-oh

If I was a scooter, then I'd probably scoot away
Why is it always the end? The end was yesterday
This may be the last time that you see this ugly face
I was walking down to Bricklayers and ripped apart by snakes

So call if you're feeling kind of sad
What's the point of us all balding like your dad?
If your colours fade away
You'll keep my heart in Texas, Penge East and Bombay
(Huh) So call if you're feeling kind of sad
What's the point of us all balding like your dad?
So call if you're feeling kind of sad
What's the point of us all turning to the bag?
Oh-oh-oh