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Steve Berman (skit)

Eminem

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Phone ringing in the background [Secretary]
Mr. Berman? [Steve Berman]
What?! [Secretary]
We have Eminem here to see you
[Steve Berman](Eminem) About fuckin' time! Send him in
(Steve! Good to see ya man) Look who decided to show his face!
I hope you've had fun in the last 4 years.
(Look man, I apologize again for)
For shooting me?!
Do you know I lost the use of my right arm?
(Again, it was a mistake)
(A terrible mist- are you wearing a bulletproof vest?)

And then you go and you do what?
Hide out?
Stay in Detroit from us 5 years
While the music industry melts the fuck down?
Do you know how many people lost their jobs
because of your fuckin vacation?
(Well that's actually why I'm here,
I was gonna, put out some new music
and I wanted to play it for you, and get your opinion)

Do I really need to hear it?
Let me guess, another album about poor me,
I'm so famous that it's ruined my rich little life,
And I'm such a tortured artist.
Let me make music about it and my tragic love life,
Am I on to something here?
(Come on man it's not like that yo-)
You know what? Just hand the fuckin thing over

I'm done talkin to you.
Think you can just come and go as you please.
Big selfish superstar
(Steve, I had a drug problem)
Oh poor me, I had a drug problem.
Who hasn't had a drug problem in this town?
You know what?
*cocks gun* (Hey! hey!)
Just lay the shit down on my desk and get the fuck out
(Woah, woah, woah. Jesus Christ man! )
(Alright alright here, fine) What's this shit?
Two CD's?
(That's what I've been tryin to tell you man, there's 2 albums)
Just get out! (Alright!)
Get the fuck out (Alright man, see you later)

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