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Eighteen Weeks

Dead Lakes


Selfishness is disease
I hope it won't take me
I hope it won't break me
Like it's breaking all my friends

Any means to an end
Is it really that fucked up that I'd rather be dead
I know this will make me vulnerable
But I have to know
Did you ever care more than you showed?

When you left you for eighteen weeks
Did you ever think of me?
I hope that when you crack a smile
I fill your headspace for a while

If you ever wondered why I'm always scared
I've seen people change they remain unaware
Like their loved ones were never there
I'm reaching out, I wish you cared

Would you dream of me?
Even when I slip into anxiety
Would you believe in me?
Even if it cost you everything

Would you dream of me?
When you sleep?
I hear you calling my name
The air on your teeth
When you speak of me

When you left you for eighteen weeks
Did you ever think of me?
I hope that when you crack a smile
I fill your headspace for a while

If you ever wondered why I'm always scared
I've seen people change they remain unaware
Like their loved ones were never there
I'm reaching out, I wish you cared

Would you dream of me?
Even when I slip into anxiety
Would you believe in me?
Even if it cost you everything

Would you dream of me?
When you sleep?

I hear you calling my name
The air on your teeth
When you speak of me

It's complicated but I think I'll be fine
Because you can't turn the clock and you can't rewind

Still jaded, I missed all the signs
20 20 vision, but with you I'm blind

So hold your tongue and let me speak
When you left it left me weak
Let's find out how far I sink
Tie anchors to my feet

When you left you for eighteen weeks
Did you ever think of me?
I hope that when you crack a smile
I fill your headspace for a while

If you ever wondered why I'm always scared
I've seen people change they remain unaware
Like their loved ones were never there
I'm reaching out, I wish you cared

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