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    PLAY

    Your Uncle Walter's going on and on
    'bout everything he's seen and done
    the voice of fifty years experience
    he's drunk watching the television
    you know he's been around the world
    last night he flew to Baghdad
    in his magical armchair
    with cigarettes and a six pack
    yeah, he just got back
    the spit's flying everywhere
    hey hey hey hey

    CHORUS 1
    your Uncle Walter's going on and on
    (oh you're back so late)
    where did you go that you were gone so long?
    and how could you leave me here
    so long with Uncle Walter?

    Your Uncle Walter saw
    who fired the shots
    he drove his chair in the cavalcade
    He's flown from South Africa to
    countries where they beat themselves
    on the backs with chains
    there was a fleet of battleships
    and one reclining chair
    headed north on the Arabian Sea
    Now he's back to tell us what
    he and his oldest boy Blair
    they're getting rich with
    a mail order scheme oh oh

    CHORUS 2
    your Uncle Walter's going on and on
    (we're so glad you're home)
    where did you go that you were gone so long?
    and how could you leave me here
    so long with Uncle Walter?

    Your Uncle Walter told me
    everything he'd do if he was president
    Now what a perfect world
    this world would be
    if he was president now
    but he's not!

    And he sees the children smoking pot
    he knows that in a moment they'll be
    shooting up heroin
    teardrops in his armchair
    a fifty minute lecture
    tobacco juice rolling down his chin

    CHORUS 1

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    Todas as letras de Ben Folds Five

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