Xmas is comin', I'm gettin' fat
Cruisin' through town in a black cadillac
I remember when you bought me my first bat
It's now time to bring that feelin' back

I want a Transylvanian Xmas
Like the ones we had back home
I wanna bite on a cute girls' neck
Beneath the mistletoe, oh-oh
'Cause I'm homesick for the old country
And it never seems to snow around here
I want a Transylvanian Xmas this year

Santa Claus is comin' down tonight
But when he gets to my house he's gonna get a fright
It's not that I'm a sick sadistic creep
It's just I'm so excited I can't sleep