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    What's the matter with the songs he's singin'
    Can't you tell that they're pretty lame
    After listenin' to a couple albums
    Well, they all start to sound the same

    So he tried to change his musical style
    He tossed all his ballads in the circular file
    Then he found the punk sound
    Breakin' ground all around
    It's still Billy Joel to me

    What's the matter with the tune he's writin'
    Well, you know it's gonna be a smash
    It's so nice when you're a big name artist
    Doesn't matter if it sounds like trash

    Now everybody thinks the new wave is super
    Just ask Linda Ronstadt or even Alice Cooper
    It's a big hit, isn't it
    Even if it's a piece of junk
    It's still Billy Joel to me

    Woah, it doesn't matter what the critics say about him
    'Cause he doesn't worry how they feel
    When you're record's sellin' millions and it's goin' triple platinum
    You don't worry 'bout your next meal
    'Cause money is no big deal

    Maybe he should dye his hair bright pink
    And stick a safety pin through his cheeks
    Then he'd really fit the new wave image
    But he couldn't sit down for weeks

    Don't you know about the record business, honey
    You gotta be trendy if you wanna make some money
    Now everybody's sayin' that he sure sounds funny
    But it's still Billy Joel to me

    All right, Alfred
    Oh

    I can hardly wait 'til his next album
    Well, I'll bet it's gonna be the rage
    Buy a ticket to his next big concert
    Well, I wonder what he'll do on stage

    It might be disco and it might be the blues
    Or maybe even somethin' like the B-52's
    Just a handclap, finger snap
    Even if it's mindless pap
    It's still Billy Joel to me

    Everybody's sayin' that he sure sounds funny
    But it's still Billy Joel to me

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