If there ever was a way to rate a man
On a cowboy scale of one to ten
Kinda like you would a women or a chili pepper
A one ain't hot, but a ten'll stop your ticker
It'd be based on courage and attitude
Not the band on the hat or the bling on the boot
Less about the out, more about the within
On this cowboy scale of one to ten

Now take the pretty boy over at the bar for example
His Resistol's huge and his B. S. is ample
But I got a feelin' he's nevеr stepped in none
And on thе cowboy scale that puts him down around a one
Now the guy in the ball cap, the t-shirt, and dirty ol' jeans
Got a dozen gold buckles that you'll probably never see
'Cause he really don't give a damn what you think he is
On your cowboy scale of one to ten

Some ride bulls and some ride fences
Some ride off into that sunset
Some drive cattle and some drive Chevy's
But they all drive them ladies crazy

Now the cowgirls, boys, they're the ones who know
The real deal from ol' Ricky Rodeo
Cause let me tell ya fellas, 'til they see you ride
They'll never give you more than a four, maybe five
Now not all cowboys hail from the Lonestar state
California, Alaska to Canada, eh?
I even know a few hippies, long hair and tattoos
That sure are some tough mother buckaroos

Some ride bulls and some ride fences
Some ride off into that sunset
Some drive cattle and some drive Chevy's
But they all drive them ladies crazy

So if ya ever took a big ol' dip of Copenhagen
Started barroom brawls or just participated
Know a quarter horse can't be started with a coin
Y'ain't quite there yet, boys, but you're getting warm
I've been around some, and I'd like to say
If you really wanna know who's the real John Wayne
Well, that's the folks who serve and protect this great land
And on the cowboy scale
That's a top drawer ten